leaves/changing

the fall is my favorite.

i am filled with anticipation to feel the nostalgia the autumn brings.

i love this place.

since my last update, very little of interest has happened aside from the party of august 7.

i kept seeing flyers all over downtown for a house party on s. french broad, so, knowing very few people in this town, i decided to force myself to walk down there and meet some new folks.

after struggling to find s. french broad and constantly texting my friend josh for help navigating, i finally arrived at the jumpoff point for a very interesting evening. i walked at least 5 blocks (it felt like nearly 12) down a dark, completely silent street. i began to grow a little concerned. as i passed a church, outside of which were two very sketchy looking individuals with whom i avoided eye contact, a couple cop cars appeared. the cruisers slowed down and hit their flashers as i passed the church. the two folks apparently were as sketchy as i perceived them to be. i heard their protests of innocence as they were being handcuffed.

undaunted, i pressed on. i wanted to party. well, mostly i thought i deserved a beer for walking so far to a party that may or may not be awesome. finally, i arrived at the party. rather, the end of the party. as i walked up to a scene of 5-6 hippieish looking folks, ranged in age from mid 30s to early 50s, i began to feel as though i made a mistake.

"is this the party i saw flyers for?" my timid question hung in the air for a second as everyone turned to look at me.

"oh man, did one of the fireworks hit you, dude?"

i knew i was in the right place. they told me the cops came and shut down the live music and fireworks due to complaints from neighbors, but the beers were still cold and available. i gladly helped myself to a miller high life and introduced myself around. i can't remember anyone's name save for the large, longhaired fellow named moose. moose was my favorite.

turns out that everyone sitting around drinking were all members of the bands that were supposed to play that night. they were all extremely friendly and interested in my life and aspirations. we talked about playing music, the strange musical history of western north carolina, loop pedals, touring, and other similar topics. they were fascinated with me. they all remarked about the rare nature of someone seeing flyers for a house party and walking across town to attend. they seemed proud of my drive and willingness to truly plug into the music scene as well as my knowledge and love of music. i was flattered, to say the least, and almost immediately felt absolutely comfortable talking with this group of complete strangers.

eventually, after several beers were consumed and the hour grew late, i decided it was time to walk home. a few of the party guests came over, shook my hand, and told me it was a pleasure to meet me. my ego was well fed that evening.

i'm pretty sure i won't see any of them again, but if i do i will thank them for their hospitality. it convinced me that asheville is the place for me to be at this moment in my life.

learning curve

as i was walking into downtown earlier this afternoon, i saw a gentleman with a guitar strapped to his back walk in front of stopped traffic and offer a flower to the annoyed drivers of the cars. knowing that i was soon to deal with this stranger, i put my guard up a little bit and tried not to make eye contact. i'm pretty good with people, but i think i hate strangers. at least, i hate being alone around strangers.

"hey bro! hey!"

i turned to face him.

"i just stole two dollars from the catholic church! god's gonna be pissed! i'm gonna buy a beer with it!"

i was so caught off guard by what he said that i actually laughed out loud really, really hard. i smiled at him and told him to enjoy.

he saw a car full of old women, walked up to them and said, "I LOVE YOU GUYS!!" The old women in the car were tickled and replied, "and we love your britches!"

i didn't notice his britches.

maybe it's because i'm up here alone with no true obligations yet, but i've been doing a lot of self-reflection and re-examining of a lot of aspects of my life. i think this has left me vulnerable to new experiences like this one and the conversation in the previous post. perhaps "open" is the better word.

i live in asheville

thus begins a new chapter.

since i will be here in asheville for a month pretty much by myself, i decided to start this new blog. i want to document what's going on in my mind in some way that's not as intense as songwriting. perhaps this will help the songwriting. it will, i'm sure, help me decipher the noise that billows and stacks up upon itself inside my head and, maybe, help me organize it.

while walking around downtown this afternoon, i was stopped by a man. this man looked like the quintessential asheville hippie: huge beard, earth tones, satchel. i was sure he'd ask me for money, but, to my surprise, he asked me if i read nonfiction. i replied, "yeah, sure." he cocked his head slightly, looking me in the eye and added to his initial query: "i mean, like stuff about people dealing with adversity and rising up to meet the challenge?"

this struck a chord somewhere within me. i told him about a collection of stories i was reading, about a book called into thin air that i read several years ago, but couldn't come up with anything else. he thanked me for stopping to chat with him and began to continue on his way.

my hand was on the door handle of one of the record stores downtown when he turned around and asked me, "have you ever read the new testament?" i let out a huge internal groan but did not allow it to read on my face, wanting to keep an open mind. had this been in chapel hill or durham, i would have dismissed this as a crazy religious man attempting to convert me.

he was not, however, trying to convert me. as far as i can surmise, all he wanted was a conversation. he told me of his life as a typical suburban kid succumbing to typical suburban ennui. he told me of the moment his life took a turn for the difficult and how a friend advised him to read the bible. before i could say anything in response, he quickly added, "i can't make you believe any of this and i can't make you be or do what i want you to be or do," before explaining that his belief in god did not come from any prescribed religion. "there's beauty in the world," he said, "and our body functions without us even having to think about it. it's amazing."

i realized i was about to be late to an appointment at the bank. the man asked me if he was keeping me from anything and i, to my chagrin, had to reply that he was. this man did not change my beliefs or even make me question them. he did seem to sense something in me that made him want to start a conversation, however. perhaps there is something about me that struck him as interesting; i don't know.

it was simply a nice conversation that had absolutely no ulterior motive that i could detect. i'm not sure what kind of effect this is having on me, but it's something.

so, now, i live in asheville.